i wish i was beautiful...*confession 1*

but not the kind of beautiful that society seems obsessed with.

like the shilpa shetty kinda pretty, although those eyebrows, sigh. *confession 2*i miss my stick thin eyebrows sometimes. what i mean to say is thank you saabirah for convincing me not to do them like that. now if everyone else around me wasn't plucking theirs, mine wouldn't look so bad. hint hint for purely selfish reasons of course :0)

and i dont mean the emma bunton kind of beauty either, but i'll leave that there as people are getting a bit worried abiout my obsession with that and the best said about my *confession 3* blonde obsession in general the better. don't worry gry i'm over it now (almost)

anyway, so beauty then.

we live with a society obsessed with the beauty of women. i walked into my form room a little early once, and the guys in my group were just talking about girls in such a scary way. i though it may have been celebrities or something, but it was girls in the college and without gatting too graphic, let's just say it had to to do with measurements:( i was so appalled, but i don't know, maybe i overreacted (by walking out of the lesson and refusing to teach them until they apologised) as it was just guys being guys and maybe that's just what guys talk about when they're alone?? (apparently i only have guys in my tutor group now, not quite sure what happened to the girls!) maybe they're just avoiding the room because that's how the guys talk about them, mutter mutter

but i wonder, are our men any different? because i've found when it comes to marriage that seems to be the first thing that they are interested in. which is fine, i can understand that attraction is important, but just don't use hadiths to justify it. (again with the muttering) and just for the record, that dream girl you have in your head isn't always going to look like that, and she most definitely doesn't look like that in the morning :)

anyway, back to what i was intending to write. have you ever met someone and they are so beautiful because of their deeds and the way they speak and act? that's the kind of beauty we should be looking for in our friends and spouses right. right? for it's the beauty that Allah Almighty sees.

it is narrated in Muslim that Alah's messenger, upon whom be peace said, "Allah looks not at your figures, nor at your outward appearance but He looks at your hearts and deeds"

and good behaviour and morals really do make a person beautiful. so that's what im aspiring for. a beautiful heart. and *confession 4* it's hard. as it can't be sorted out (or covered up) with makeup and ghds:) but it's a journey, right caged bird?